Author: Cheryl
•7:42 PM

Summary: In a time where some business ethics are sorely needed in some of the big businesses in this county, The Office decides to approach this subject of what is good and bad to do at the workplace (pay attention AIG, well, maybe not) with an ethics seminar.

The show starts with a cold open. For those of you that don't know what a cold open is, its the teaser scene as you would say, that kinda throws you right into the action before the opening credits begin. This is one of my favorite ones. Jim is speaking to Pam on the phone. Pam is still at art school. And be advised that this is Pam's only scene in this episode (and sorely missed). Jim decides to tell the office they are engaged with Pam on speakerphone. Let the love fest begin.

Oscar- "I thought you were already engaged?"
Angela - "That was Roy. She was engaged to Roy."
Kevin - "I got a gift for Pam and Roy, do I have to get another one?"
Andy "Little close to my engagement Tuna, what's your game here"
Dwight - "She's not a virgin you know?"

Michael is his undying love for the couple that is Jim and Pam, tackles Jim onto the ground. You hear Pam on the line go "Sorry".

Holly has to conduct an ethics seminar. Michael and Holly make their entrance in the seminar to Olivia Newton-John's "Physical", but its "Lets get ethical". With their 80's workout headbands and all. Again, Holly is Michael's perfect match. The reason the class is being held is because of Ryan actions at corporate, who sounds like he really doesn't regret what he did.

Michael thinks Holly is taking the seminar too seriously, reading from the binder. The group starts to take over the meeting by saying what they consider ethics or not. Holly asks the group to let her know if any of them have ever faced an ethical dilemma in the workplace.

Michael's example "When I discovered YouTube, I didn't work for 5 days. I did nothing. I viewed Cookie Monster sings Chocolate Rain about a 1000 times." I can't pick on Michael here, I probably would have watched that a ton of times too. Love me some Cookie Monster.

The employees give their examples of their time theft from Global. But Meredith's time theft takes on a whole new level.

Meredith "Have you guys ever met Bruce Meyers, the Scranton rep for Hammermill? For the past 6 years I have been sleeping with him in exchange for discounts on our supplies and Outback Steakhouse gift certificates."

Wow, that is some serious time theft and about 100 other company violations and gets her tips in steak and deep fried onions. Michael tries to blow off her statement and goes back to flattering Holly. Holly pulls Meredith into Michael's office.

Meredith "No, I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for the discounted paper, not alot of fruit in those looms". I think that is a new slogan for that company. Holly is pushing for Meredith to be terminated.

Dwight says he never does anything personal at work. Jim decides to use a stopwatch and time every little personal thing Dwight does, including yawning, arguing and making fun of Jim. Jim even has a discussion with Andy about Battlestar Gallactica and gets parts of it wrong, just to see if Dwight will engage in an argument over it. Dwight struggles to stay out of it.

Michael asks Holly to lunch to go over this situation, by dumping her lunch in the trashcan. Every time Holly tries to go over the situation at lunch, Michael jokes or changes the subject. Seems like a new perfect team is not seeing eye to eye here. Instead of firing Meredith, Michael suggests they punish her by getting a chastity belt for her. Hey, why didn't I ever think of that in my job in HR.

Jim's report of Dwight's activities so far "He has not stopped working for a second. At 12:45 he sneezed while keeping his eyes open, I always though it was impossible. At 1:32 he peed and I know that because he did it in a open soda bottle under the desk while filling out expense reports". The visual of that is bad enough but they show Dwight putting the bottle on his desk. Yuck. Brings back memories of Dwight peeing in a soda can when Michael took them on the trip to Utica.

Jim does catch Dwight missing for 19 minutes and 42 seconds. Dwight won't tell him why. The camera pans over to Angela buttoning up her shirt. Oh snap, that is still going on? And 19 minutes, Dwight I am very impressed!

Michael gets mad in only the way that Michael can when Holly says that Dunder Mifflin is not a family but a workplace. He throws out her leftovers, takes the coffee pot away from her, and cuts in front of her at the Xerox machine. Holly "In middle school I was a hall monitor, and the kids used to stuff egg salad in my locker. Yeah, I was just hoping middle school was over"

Michael and Holly have a conference call with Kendall, the HR rep from Corporate. He decides that since the company is getting a discount at a tough time with the economy, that these circumstances don't warrant any actions. Now I try to suspend disbelief with my shows, but as I said, I work in HR and I have never seen anything like this swept under the carpet. Seems like corporate is the one that needs some business ethics.

Holly tries to argue with Kendall and he yells at her back, telling her that she should just get signatures that people attended the meeting and keep it at that. Michael feels bad for her for trying and yells at everyone to get back in the meeting. Michael watches her with admiration as she reads the rest of the seminar from the book.

The staff enjoys a nice lunch, courtesy of Meredith, from Outback Steakhouse.
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